Top 30 Bad Guys From Super Mario Brothers

10. Dry Bone

Dry bones were one of the most underrated Mario villains. They were practically invincible, immune to fire and being stomped on, though they could be destroyed by the hammer suit or the likes. I always wondered why Bowser didn’t get more of these guys to help take on Mario and his compatriots since they can laugh at two of their man attacks. I even imagine that they are more angry at Mario then the average Koopa Troopa since they were probably killed by Mario in the first place. Which brings up another point, shouldn’t there be way more these guys anyway? Think of the number of Koopas Mario has stomped through in the past.

9. Thwomp

Thwomps are by far the most tragic of all the Mario baddies. They spend their entire existence in a dark castle unable to move unless Mario walks past him, with the only goal of squishing him as he runs by. They usually only get one try and then the castle is destroyed. What’s worse is that they look really constipated as they do it. But one could imagine that not having a bathroom break, or even a bathroom, it would tend to build. Nonetheless you always got a certain satisfaction after beating them and watching as they made faces and knowing that they have now lived an entirely meaningless existence.

8. The Sun

Remember this badass? The most nefarious sun in the video game medium came from Mario 3. This angry sun would swoop down at you after circling the sky for a couple of seconds. This sun made the gamer tense in a way that he never knew before for a Mario game. The Sun would never go away. He would spend an entire level getting in your way and making you perform extraordinary jumps to avoid him. These are the levels you would just want to run by as fast as possible rather than staying in one place with this heated sun.

7. Boom Boom

Boom Boom was the boss you would always have the fact at the end of a mini Fortress in Mario 3. Some gamers found him easy, others found him hard. If you didn’t know how to approach him, he could be evasive and difficult to jump on with his flying power. If you knew to blitzkrieg and attack quick though, he would be done in a matter of seconds. Three jumps on the head and he was done. Just jump on him right after the first jump and he wouldn’t move. Give him room to fly though and you would be dashing back and forth on the screen confused on how to defeat this boss.

6. Lemmy Koopa

Lemmy looked like he was a 80′s punk rock reject turned circus clown. He sported a multi-color mohawk, and in his first appearance he rolled around on a large ball from the command room of his airship. In dinosaur land he seemed to tone down the hair style, though he still rocked a white mohawk. In either case he wasn’t easiest boss but he wasn’t the hardest either. As small children both members of the Old-Wizard crew would run around pretending to be Lemmy and Iggy. For some reason we thought they were the coolest of the kooplings.

5. Spiny

Spiny is one of the most famous characters in the Mario series. He appeared in most of the games and would not be easily defeated. You couldn’t jump on him because of his spiked back. You were left to fireballs and star power to be able to take out this slow but powerful enemy. Spiny had a great knack for getting in the way of Mario. Just when you thought you were making an progress jumping from block to block, there would be spiny walking slowly toward you which would take you down a size because of Mario’s inability to jump on him. Spiny’s legacy was this perfectly annoying quality about him.

4. Podoboos

What were the Podoboos? They were the neutral faced fireballs emerging from lava in most of the Mario brothers games. Was there ever an object you had to evade more often than these fireballs? These balls of lava would all appear in castle levels when you were trying to make a difficult jump. Sometimes they would be coupled together and jump at opposite times making your jumps dependent on precise controlling. Podoboo would never leave the Mario series because Mario always needed castles to conquer. Anyone and everyone who has played a video game has come across these simple but irritating lava balls.

3. Goombas

Oh your first time. Everyone remembers it. Such mental oddities as what the weather was like, or what time of the day it is stick in your brain to help recall the situation. Many of us were there with Mario for his first time. The first time in Level 1 -1 that his eyes gazed upon his target. Mario knew what had to be done. Hit that shit…into the ground! Poor old Goomba was the first lowly enemy that Mario ever had the chance to pounce on in his quest for glory and the sweet deliciousness that was the Princess. But those of you rooting for the Goomba don’t despair, for there are hundreds of their kind. Perhaps even millions. They spawn with ease from the bowels of the Mushroom Kingdom as they give allegiance to Bowser and must live in shame for doing so.

The Goomba’s main source of aggression most likely stems from their Napoleon Complex towards everyone else in the realm of Mario, and the fact that they just get tooled on by the protagonists at all times. But you do have to feel bad for the little SOBs. The G-men are just the foot soldiers. They are the ones that are killed in such merciless ways that their very existence is thrown from the memory train with haste as the next enemy appears on the screen. So give the little buggers a break. Bowser is going to make you go through as many of these guys as he can before meeting him in final battle. And the path shall be stained with their grotesquely smelling mushroom bodies.

2. Koopa Troopas

Being the lowest in the chain of command must be tough. Especially if it is in the Koopa Army and your Commander is Bowser himself. The Koopa Troopas don’t have it easy. Not by a long shot. Let’s be brutally honest here, the Koopas are pretty dumb. They can be observed most of the time just walking back and forth, having been stuck in some sort of trench. Sometimes they even just wander off the screen and fall into the bottomless pits that so often are the takers of extra lives for Mario, and also the final resting place for their lemming-esque kind.

It is important to note the different colors of the Koopa Troopa. The colors are dependent on which version of Mario you are playing. Their predominant shells are green, red, blue and yellow in color. The green being the most inferior, with the red being a close second. But all in all the Koopas serve the purpose of dying for a cause. That purpose and cause are that their armored shells were supposed to protect them from danger and prolong their meaningless lives. However, Mario would rather use their defense systems as his offensive systems, and wreak havoc on Bowser with the armor of his infantry.

1. Bowser

Why is Bowser number one? Well its not just because he’s the leader of a strange tribe of turtles. Its not because he’s big and mean. Its not because he can breathe fire, or survive countless falls into lava. No, no its not for any of these reasons. Its that never say die attitude. So what if you have the advantage of an entire army of turtles, a family of evil children, a massive fleet of airships, an enormous castle, and the ability to conquer the mushroom kingdom over and over and over again, and still, despite all this a couple of plumbers trounce you every single time. Its the fact that after every one of these humiliating defeats, he gets up, dusts himself off, and starts with a new plan. Thats the American spirit for you.

Who cares if Mario broke all of your bridges, you can build airships, oh… he destroyed all those… Well let’s build a clown copter and take over the dinosaur kingdom… oh he smashed that too? Well let’s steal some paintings and stick people in there… oh that didn’t work either? Well let’s take it too space! Bowser has been at it so long even he forgot why he’s doing it. Here is a guy who not only wrote the book on kidnapping princesses, but also on recovering from failure. Time and time again his best laid plans were thrown back in his face, and time and time again he went back to the drawing board. Never once did it cross his mind that kidnapping Princess Toadstool is bad idea. In fact Bowser knows its a good idea, he just hasn’t done it yet. But when he does we’ll know about it and Princess Toadstool will never be seen again. When he finally retires he’s going to write one hell of a memoir. Imagine the charismatic character he must have been to keep his minions loyal. I doubt any modern army would stay loyal after the number of defeats Bowser’s had. Ladies and gentlemen we submit to you that the King of the Koopas is the greatest bad guy in any Mario brothers game.