Old-Wizard.com / Nerd News

Nerd News

What is a nerd? A nerd covers a wide variety of descriptions that can include the following: someone who stays up in their room playing Final Fantasy 3 on weekend nights, someone who asks a girl out on a date that consists of eating popcorn and building LEGO castles, someone who plays a game so long that they die from starvation.

What is news? News is generally publications of the "going-ons" of recent events either on a local or world level to keep one "updated" on what is currently going on.

What type of up-to-date news would a nerd want who plays video games so long to the point of emaciation? This is what you will find in this section.

Doomsday! 2/26/2008

Jesus Christos! Corpus Christi!

It is official; the Norwegian government has excavated the former apartment / love nest of Superman, and is now using it to store seeds.

No, not those kinds of seeds. That's in Holland. It's all the same European Union though. Anyways, reports from around the world indicate that the Norwegian government financed the construction of the "Doomsday Vault" in order to fill the space with seed collections from around the world. It was done at the bare bones price of about 9.4 million American greenbacks.

The "vault" itself has been built into the side of a mountain that borders the North Pole. The storage space will be serving as the ultimate safety net against any type of human errors, such as war and poverty. It will also work great against world-wide crop changes, effects of globalization, global warming, and any other natural disaster.

So far, over a million seeds have been placed in the 427 foot deep icy chamber, with the hope that they may never be needed in an uncertain future. The United Nations also played a roll in the operation since 2004 by supplying much needed funding to the project, in order to promote crop diversity. The majority of the seeds are from plants that sustain global food supplies. There have also been calls for other types of plant life as well.

This is not the first project of its kind, as there is a similar seed bank in Sussex, England. Not to mention the unknown paranoid billion/multi-millionaires out there who have constructed their own Doomsday survival chambers. For when the day comes that the seas boil and the heavens fall those guys will be ready with a year supply of Dinty Moore stew and Easy-Mac. Plus, the US Government certified duct-tape and plastic wrap.

Rest assured the original Doomsday is still strapped to that meteor and hurtling through space so he won't be threatening our global food supplies. Thanks again Superman. Or was it The Eradicator?

-Weekday Warrior

For more information, type "Norwegian Doomsday Vault" into your favorite search-engine. Read.

HD DVD is Dead!!! 2/19/2008

Today marks a day of a new technology crashing to the ground. Toshiba Corporation, the brainchild behind the glorified new movie media known as High Definition Digital Video Disc, or HD-DVD for short, pulled the plug on their so called superior technology. The ongoing and bloody battle has been raging for months where Sony's technology known as Blu Ray was going head to head with HD-DVD. This was known to come to an end at some time, as the differences in the two mediums were virtually unnoticeable. The Blu Ray discs hold a bit more amount of data on them, which makes them technically superior to the HD-DVD medium. The only fall back that has been mentioned about the Blu Ray is that the protective coating on the bottom of the disc is mere fractions thinner than the protective coating of the HD-DVD discs. Users have to be more gentle and show more care for their Blu Ray Discs when handling them, which can be seen as a downfall. These are the main differences in the two mediums, and both of them offer the same exact high fidelity and the difference can't be noticed by the human eye. When it really comes down to it, the amount of movie companies that were choosing HD-DVD were dwarfed by the amount of companies who chose Blu Ray. It was always a disappointment when a new movie came out to DVD, and the company chose HD-DVD instead of Blu Ray. Well now that has been laid to rest, and in the 34th round of fighting, HD-DVD is down for the count. Blu Ray is now the king of media, and improvements will be made to this technology to offer its viewers an even more intense viewing experience.

Oink is Dead 10/23/2007

Today marks a sad day in the realm of digital music and file sharing. What was first started as oink.co.uk and more recently transferred to oink.cd, was the cozy little corner of the internet with a nice music sharing community. Users were able to upload full albums to the site and share their beloved musical jewels with other users. As long as users kept their sharing ratio at a decent level, everybody was allowed to take and give music or other files as they wished. We have caught news that today the owners of oink.cd got their servers raided in Amsterdam, and the site has been completely shut down. The greedy music giants have shut down a perfect utopia of people who have enjoyed and shared their music for years and years. When will the music battle finally end? When will we be back to full album sharing over a digital medium? This was a breakthrough service, which united people on a common ground, and has been devastated instantly, with no warning or remorse.

Halloween Re-Make 8/5/2007

Due out in theaters August 31, 2007 is a brand new Halloween re-make. Like Luke Skywalker before the Endor Mission, we had a bad feeling about this remake when we first heard about it. As fans of Michael Myers, we just don’t know exactly what to say about this. However, even though this may not be a straight re-make (an “updated re-imagining”) it seems like it will be pretty darn close to the original and we are expecting Rob Zombie to allow some kick as scenes and costume design. We remain cautiously optimistic.

Trailer:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n-Y2e5aukuI

New Simpsons Movie in Theaters 7/27/2007

Finally a Simpsons movie. Its been 18 years in the making so you would think it should be good, but as Star Wars Episode One proved, the amount of time it takes to make a movie has little to do with how good the movie actually is. We're looking forward to it anyway because now that they don't have the F.C.C. to deal with, we're hoping Homer finally finishes his sentence when he says "Why you little..."

Sean Connery will not be in Indiana Jones 4 7/120/07

Sean Connery, who Zeromage recently discvered is a Scotsman, and not Welsh, has announced he will not be in the new Indiana Jones Movie, finding retirement too enjoyable. Also, John Rhys-Davies, of Lord of the Rings fame, was not asked to return as Sallah. This announcement can only make a bad idea even worse, as Sean Connery has the ability to make even a bad movie semi-enjoyable (see Dragonheart). What we at Old-Wizard have to ask is, why are they even making a new Indiana Jones movie anyway? Why can't George Lucas just leave a good thing alone? Why is he so bent on ruining every good thing he's ever done? What's next, Willow 2? We sure hope not.

Blobfest 07/12/2007

It’s that time of the year again. That’s right, this coming weekend, the Colonial Theatre in Phoenixville, PA pays tribute to the 50th anniversary of the 1957 filming of “The Blob.” Blobfest activities will be centered on the theme "An Inconvenient Blob," a very clever play on the title of Al Gore's popular 2006 documentary An Inconvenient Truth. We have to admit, we’re all pretty impressed over here.

Much in the vein of The Rocky Horror Picture Show, there's a famous reenactment of the "Running Out," scheduled this year for Friday night. Blobfest's emcee, Shane Stone, transforms into Dr. Frank N. Stone, sporting a white lab coat, black-felt goatee, and nerdy, black-rimmed glasses. He'll direct what he calls "the controlled chaos," when people storm out of the theater in make-believe fright. Last year, close to 400 people ran out of the theater, while 150 people stood across the street to watch the ensuing madness.

To celebrate the filming, the cast and crew will reunite for a panel discussion. Producer Jack Harris will be coming from Los Angeles. Crew member Howard Fishlove will be returning from Chicago. Screenwriter Kate Phillips, who worked on the screenplay for $125 and who turns 94 soon, will also be joining the reunion.
Finally, local resident Maryann Decarlo, who played one of the teenagers running out of the theater and falling down, will also be returning to the Colonial. In honor of the weapons that saved the town, there'll be a parade of fire extinguishers on Saturday, led by the winner of the scream contest. the movie, the Blob is about to devour McQueen when the town's teenagers spray carbon dioxide from fire extinguishers, freezing the gelatinous monster just in time.

In addition to the scream contest, there's also a tinfoil-hat competition, a nod to homemade protective wear as seen in other classic sci-fi B movies. New to this year's Blobfest is a film shorts contest titled "Backyard B Movie Blob Bonanza." The winners of the BBMBB receive the Shorty award, named after the director. The five-minute films are broken up into three age categories, and winning films will be screened on Saturday night.
The Colonial Theatre will also be screening The Blob three times throughout the weekend, along with other sci-fi horror movies. Saturday's street fair will also have an environmental education booth, tying the theme of going green with the red-jellied scare.

Next year, Blobfest organizers plan on celebrating the 50th anniversary of the release of the film. "We're getting two celebrations out of one," laughed Lentz.

Happy Pi day! 3/13/2007

Pi Day is on March 14th because of the way that the date is written, 3/14. Also, 1:59 on Pi Day is “Pi Minute”, because the next few digits of Pi are 3.14 159. Anyway, go out and celebrate Pi in any way you can. Make some pie, listen to the song "Cherry Pie" by Warrant. Have some Cherry pie. Have a riot. And, try and memorize Pi to 100 digits. Who knows how much fun is awaiting you.

Death of a Gaming Store

Doth thoughest knowest of thine Dragons Lair in yonder West Hartford? For many a fine yeareth, the writers of Old-Wizard hath gone to thine Dragon's Lair for gaming supplies and found both supplies and stinkiness. Now those days are over as the Dragon's Lair is empty with no Dragon's or treasures. However the stink remains. All the halls are filled with its foul reek. Farewell to you gaming store we've been thrown out of, loved and hated for so long. Why you closed, we are uncertain, although our hearts will be forever open to your return. Plus it will save us gas by not having to drive so far for commons. Adieu.

Monster Neverwinter Nights Update

Theres a new update with a plethora of new monsters, placable scenery, two new tilesets and scripts! Now you can take your adventures into a tropical paradise or a sultry underwater cave. The content is from the latest module "Pirates of the Sword Coast" which allows you to become a feared and fabled pirate, like Johnny Dep. Pirates are all the rage nowadays. No one cares about ninjas anymore. You can download the updates here: http://nwn.bioware.com/players/167/ or you can return to that flea-nest you call home here: www.yahoo.com.

Holocaust Deniers Meet in Tehran - 12/3/2006

On Monday Iran began hosting a Holocaust deniers from around the world in a conference debating whether the World War II genocide of Jews took place, a meeting that Israel's prime minister condemned as a "sick phenomenon.” The 67 participants from 30 countries included former U.S. Ku Klux Klan leader David Duke. The New York Times reported that Duke, a white supremacist, was expected to claim that Germany built no gas chambers or extermination camps during World War II. "Depicting Jews as the overwhelming victims of the Holocaust gave the moral high ground to the Allies as victors of the war and allowed Jews to establish a state on the occupied land of Palestine," Duke said, according to the summary of the paper he will deliver, the Times reported. The head of K.K.K. meeting with Holocaust deniers from around the world and the President of one of the countries of the Axis of Evil….Is this starting to remind anyone else of a comic book? Are we dealing with a real life Masters of Evil here? Are they really planning some sort of scheme to take over the world? If so on some level that would be pretty cool. On the other hand, there's no real life equivilent of the Mighty Avengers, so we'd all be in a lot of trouble.

Superman Returns !!! 6/30/2006

Superman returns to the big screen in the movie Superman Returns this Wednesday June 28th. The plot: With Supes off in space for 5 years looking for survivors of the Kryptonian apocalypse Lex Luthor was released from jail, and using some old widow's fortune funded an expedition to Superman's sanctum sanctorum: The Fortress of Solitude. Using a handfull of crystals he found there he plans to raise a contienent out of the ocean and sell off the new real estate. Sounds pretty stupid but hey, it's a Superman movie.

WAR! EA to buy Mythic Entertainment

The gaming giant and mass producer of mediocre games, Electronic Arts(EA), has announced its deviant intentions to buy the online gaming demi-phenom Mythic Entertainmains. While many readers may have suckled on Mythic's past holy grail, Dark Age of Camelot, the latest concern is their current brainchild, Warhammer Online. Granted they didn’t think the idea up, they have recently picked up the slack and have been developing what looks like a great mmorpg set in the warhammer universe. How the merger of EA and Mythic will affect the grandulous old world beauty we have come to expect from mythic remains to be seen. However, with the quality of games that EA has put out in the past, I fear Warhammer Online may fall into the eye of chaos(cheap pun)....

Oasis: Don't Believe The Truth - 5/30/2005

The most recent and most splendid album by this British rock band. With new members in the band, and fresh ideas running amuck, Don't Believe The Truth is an amazing masterpiece. Being tracked, mixed and mastered at several locations around the world, the finalized album is stunning. As an aging band, Oasis defintly aged beautifully with this album. No song gets tiring, enabling listeners to leave this album in their vehicle's car stereo system for several months on end....

New Site is UP!

Yes, if your reading this then you probably already realize that the new site, Old-Wizard.com, has arrived fresh on your doorstep. What you may not realize is that the site was actually written in the Klingon language and we managed to insert a babelfish into your ear last night allowing you to read the site. Search your feelings, you know its true. Old-Wizard will be with you...always.