Spymaster often gets disrespected because of his low points value, but this guy is one of the best figures in the game for his point’s cost. Just look at all the pretty colours on his dial. Stealth, Leap Climb, Smoke Cloud, Ranged Combat Expert, and Exploit Weakness are all nifty abilities for a figure that costs just 29 points. Of course, it is strange that a spy master wears a bright blue and yellow costume and advertises himself as “Spymaster”, but whatever, this clix still rocks.

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Tired of the same old Top Ten Sci-Fi movies lists that have 2001: Space Odyssey listed at number 1, and somehow manage to leave off any of the Star Trek movies? Well so are we. We think 2001 sucks and decided to make our own list of the best science fiction movies ever, other critics opinions be damned. Seriously what’s so great about that movie anyway? It puts me to sleep every time I try to watch it. Sure, the movie had some cool special effects for its time, but only if you could keep your eyes open long enough to see them. They’re spaced out between a long boring story where the most exciting thing that happens is a some monkeys going wild and a strange acid trip in outer space. And can someone tell me just what the hell is going on in that movie during the last half hour? Just because its a Stanley Kubrick movie and all the critics like it, every loser trying to make a top ten sci-fi movie list feels like he or she has to include it among the elite ten science fiction movies of all time in order to look intelligent. Well, not us. Those who know us know that we don’t care about appearing intelligent. Anyway, here’s our list. If you don’t like it, go check out Ebert’s.

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The Shelkin Brownie has possibly the most useless creature ability of all time. “Remove banding” would be a pointless creature ability, but “remove bands with other creature” is even more pointless. There is not a single creature that was ever printed with this ability. So how did they get it? There was a cycle of five uncommon lands in Legends, each of which had a static ability that gave all Legends of a certain colour “bands with other Legends.” Of course, to prevent any of these lands from being the least bit playable, they didn’t produce mana. Not even a colourless mana. What about Wolves of the Hunt? Master of the Hunt, a rare 2/2 creature, could produce 1/1 Wolves of the Hunt tokens with “bands with other Wolves of the Hunt” for another four mana apiece. After 12 mana, you’d actually have two 1/1 Wolves that could band with each other! And no, they cannot band with any other creatures, or the Master himself!

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Perhaps one of the most bare bones video games of all time, Asteroids has often claimed to be the first video game to ever be set in space. It was built on the basis of vector graphics, quite an advanced type of video display for 1977. The player piloted a wedge-shaped ship that could be moved in circles and forward. Shooting projectiles is the combined defense and offense of the ship, as your ship had to shoot and destroy incoming asteroid blocks on the screen. The game wraps around the screen edges, meaning if the asteroid moves off the top of the screen, it will continue its path from the bottom and repeat if not destroyed. This added an extra element to the game as the player can pilot their ship off the screen and on to the other side to escape from a taunting, slow-moving asteroid. The only other defensive option you have is to enter “hyperspace”, which simply meant your wedge ship disappeared, and randomly reappeared on the screen in a different place. This could be good or bad, as you could randomly appear in the path of an oncoming asteroid. Racking up the points is again your only way of knowing how well you did compared to previous games. An exciting game for sure, especially when you slip off one side of the screen for the first time …thinking that you would disappear forever…

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Plumpy. Mr. Mint cutting down candy canes with a candy cane axe. Lord Licorice and the gingerbread house! Finally meeting Queen Frostine floating in the Ice Cream Sea beforekneeling down to the all mighty King Kandy. Any of these fabled characters and places ring a bell? They sure do if you were tripping on acid and happened to wander through the psychedelic Candyland.

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Galaga was the sequel to Galaxian, but was there really a need for this game to even be made? The game is virtually identical to Galaxian in every way. Didn’t the creators realize that this stand up arcade game was pretty much the same exact thing as every other game that was set in space? Fly around your little craft on the bottom of the black screen, as enemies come at you and you try to shoot them. This game was no ground breaker. It was created to swallow your shiny quarter dollars without ever giving back. You were better off saving your money for a movie or a soda pop, as they would have both delivered a much more refreshing experience for the price.

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The level of hype surrounding Grand Theft Auto IV is something we haven’t seen since the childhood memory-killing Episode I. As such, we wanted to wait a while before we reviewed this game, just to make sure we could give our readers an honest review to the game. And now, several weeks after the game’s release we can safely say that it really is as amazing as everyone says. Even before playing Grand Theft Auto IV, the intro song for the loading screen is eerily amazing. It gives you chills as you get the feeling you are ramping up for one of the most intense experiences of your life. The world has gone wild for this smash hit release. Obviously we know there have been three prior releases and has gone overboard with itself…again. As if killing people 182 different ways in the previous chapters of GTA was not enough, you now have even more options and tools for death and destruction. As an added bonus, all of this is displayed to the gamer in beautiful 1080p high definition and surround sound crystal clear high fidelity audio offered by the current generation of gaming consoles.


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The Playstation crashed into the video market with a force not seen since Nintendo. Two years after the system’s introduction into the video games market, similarities popped up with the SNES for having an exorbitant amount of great games. Anything you wanted to play from racing games to RPG’s, from sports games to arcade fighters were all within reach for the ebullient Playstation systems. It was with the Playstation where we witnessed the biggest blow to the cartridge based platforms. The amount of information and quality graphics that could be included on CD trumped all cartridge based ambitions. It wasn’t just the increased memory and graphic technology that made the Playstation enterprise so successful though. Like the SNES, the Playstation, and the Playstation 2 both had a great wealth of memorable games. Making a list for what we thought the top ten games were for the Playstation enterprise was daunting. Having to omit certain RPG’s proved to be the most difficult part in our choices. We finally decided on our top ten though, with a hint of somberness over some of the omissions we had to make. With these next ten games, we think the reader will fully understand why the Playtstation was such a success. Great systems first and foremost come down to great games. Playstation will first and foremost be remembered for all these great games.

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At long last, the wait is over. Old-Wizard T-Shirts are finally here! Order yours today by going to our Merchandise page.

When one reads or watches a “traditional” best bands of all time list, the assumptions get unquestioned. What happens is that people who profess to be “music listeners” accept these lists without ever asking themselves “Why the fuck should I listen to anything VH1 says”. When one list “argues” for its content, others will follow suit without ever questioning the quality of the bands on the list. This being utterly lost and absorbed in the publicness of the “they” solidifies the image of bands and best bands for decades and maybe even century’s to come. For example, you will get a “traditional” barrage of answers on what the best bands from the 90’s are from people who don’t realize they are simply restating what they saw or read on the most public of public media. Certain bands get ingrained in peoples heads as “clearly the best band of the 90’s”, even without these people realizing that they themselves, NEVER LISTEN TO THESE BANDS! Another unctuous platitude comes in the way of “well, you have to include ’such and such’ when doing a greatest bands of the 90’s list” striking an imperative command that is far and away from anything that’s actually happening in the music. It’s with this in mind that Old-Wizard has decided to explore the greatest bands of the 90’s without out any tendention and without ANY “help” from outside sources. As avid music listeners ourselves, we trust our instincts over and above the people who will get angry at not including a certain band on the list because it doesn’t unconsciously remind them of the latest list in a hackneyed “Rolling Stone” issue. It’s important for the reader to realize this before they jump into any vexation regarding this list. It’s important for the reader to realize, that they should get angry at a list because it doesn’t include a band they actually LISTEN to, not because it doesn’t follow suit with “traditional” lists. Let’s get started.


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